McNuggets: A Love Story (Part I)

FAB often writes about being unlucky in love and, well, on top of being unlucky, frequently partaking of just regular old fashioned poor decision-making. But every once in a while, decisions and people come together in just the right way to make you feel loved and appreciated and so very full of chicken nuggets.

Last spring, FAB and friends attended a concert at the Prospect Park bandshell. We drank a lot at the concert at the Prospect Park bandshell. But we did not eat anything at the concert at the Prospect Park bandshell. After the show ended, Weez and I decided to meet up with some friends at Hot Bird, a favorite drinking establishment that happens to be situated directly across the street from a bright and shiny McDonalds. Newsflash: a very hungry and moderately intoxicated Fat Asian Baby cannot walk by that brightly lit beacon of fast food with a proud all white meat McNugget banner unfurled in front without immediately becoming fixated on the need for McNuggets. So after sitting at a picnic table in the courtyard of the bar staring at the bright glow of those gorgeous golden arches across the street for the duration of two more drinks, I decide I need to take matters into my own hands. McNuggets will be had. Yes, they will.

FAB politely excuses herself from the group and hightails it across the street only to discover that the door to the McNugget Palace is locked. LOCKED! Despite all lights ablaze and employees clearly bustling around inside preparing orders of what must be boxes upon boxes of tender and juicy all white meat McNuggets for Other People. Curses! McDonalds closes at midnight! Consult cell phone. It is 12:10am. Foiled by indecision, yet again! But, wait, the drive-thru is 24 hours! FAB wanders over to the end of the drive thru line and contemplates her next move. The one other time we attempted to go through a drive thru on foot was in Texas, and, let's just say, it didn't go over that well. FAB examines the cars and notices a taxi three cars in.

To be continued...